It has been busy around here. After the conference, we spent as much time with Stefan and Anabell as we could. Then on Monday, we took them to the airport. 🙁 Sad Day… 🙁
Tuesday, the washer broke. So, I have been trying to do catch up with the laundry by hand, as I had a load in the washer when it died. Oh, and I told John that I want a divorce. That of course went over like a lead balloon. However, the job I’m applying for needs some honesty. As in I don’t make diddley squat for money and I live separately from John. Told him I was going to tell the interviewer that, and he got upset. During the course of the conversation, I explained that in all honesty, I wanted a divorce. It was like he never expected that.
Um… Hello! I haven’t lived with him for over a year. Plus, some stuff that I’m not mentioning on a blog, but… In all honesty, I had my heart broken 23 years ago, and it never healed. He asked for a divorce then. We tried to work things out, and to be honest, we didn’t do too bad. I made a promise that I would work on the marriage as long as there were minor children. Well, Daniel turned 18 two years ago, and I have to admit that I still felt about the same. I wanted a divorce. Due to a number of things, I moved out of the house at 203 Walsen over a year ago. I am happier, less stressed, more relaxed and have had fewer asthma attacks than I have had in years. I still love him, but I’m not IN love with him. There is a difference.
He says he wants to talk and try to make things better so that we don’t divorce. Sorry, after 20+ years, I don’t think things will change. We’ve both changed, and I just do not see reconciliation being an option. Plus, when are we suppose to find time to talk? He works an average of 50 hours a week, and I have college, a job and other responsibilities. An hour here or there over a week is just not going to cut it or change my mind. Nor will I interrupt his work and send him back to work in a possibly upset state of mind.
And, despite what he might think, I don’t want a divorce just so that I can marry Dan. Nope! Wrong answer. I love Dan, but I won’t marry him. I never want to be married ever again. Nor do I think Dan ever wants to be married again either.
I hope to have pictures of Stefan and Anabell up by Saturday. Dan has to download them and put them on the jump drive for me. My computer is having some issues. argh… video driver issues.
Oh, and our friend is coming up from Texas!!!! Wheeee!!!!!